It seems like week by week, God is testing my strength and perservernce in every outlets. I say something that I believe and do in for example in one of my convictions and then there is a test in a situation. I really think that for the most part God has given me an amazing will to get through some tough situations. He gives me the ability to say and do the right things. He gives the ability to be on top of things. I honestly still slack off here and there but I am on top of classes more than ever before right now.

I know this semester is about to get crazy but it is my last time to one serve God and do amazing things for him. Every step I walk every word that I say every conversation that I have I want to have for him. Not myself.

Wrong Motives

We all in corinthians the love chapter. We think about love many turn to this for loving their spouse kids or other worldly obession. But in general if we want to be follows and sell out for Christ, the "love chapter" tells us to do more. "Love all things believe in all things and endure all things. Those are powerful words love believe and endure. In fact this is probaley one of the most powerful chapters in all of the Bible.

I am not joking the more I dive into the word daily, the more God just becomes more consumed in my life. Instead of worry about what tommorow might bring, I am constantly worrying about how I can serve God. I am worried about how can I approach this person about Christ. Because in the bible we have all fallen short in the kingdom of God. But thank God for Christ.

Ever since I have been back from Costa Rica things are a lot different. I am thinking about going back again or even going to Africa next summer! From a jail cell one year, to Costa Rica, to Africa. Just give God a little room and he will do amazing things! I read article in time magazine about the upcoming midterm elections. If people put so much pride and passion into God rather than stupid politics, the world would be a different place. The world would be a lot better if we lived for God rather than political ideology. Oh yeh and everyone is panicing about unemployment. 9/10 people have a freaken job! Go to Costa Rica where there is 70 percent unemployment. Enough said

PEACE WITHIN HIM

It really frustrates me how much some people do not give God a chance. I mean God gave me a second chance to walk with him and he sure has done amazing things. I mean its kinda crazy to think that I could be called to "full time youth ministry" according to two people already deeply involved with youth ministry. It is amazing to be called to "full time missionary". Its just amazing to be blessed with so much a 20 page essay could not describe. It is so amazing to live a life day by day not worrying about the things of this world. Or stupid stuff like "man I hope I'm making x amount of money next year". This sort of stuff stressed the day lights out of me but it does no longer. What stresses me out is "how can I above all else walk in your light today". Or how can I bring this person to your presence.

Surrendering is not easy, because you have to give things up. You have to give up EVERYTHING. Lose control die to yourself. Theres still parts of me here and there that wanna go have fun and get crazy. There is still parts of me that wanna go back to the fun times. But I would rather walk for him knowing that in the end God is going to provide me with everything I need. A little piece of property or getaway to where I can go and live life in peace and prosperity. I could be a 2000 square foot house on the Southside, or even an apartment as a missionary in Costa. No matter where you go God is going to provide you with peace and prosperity. Even in a jail cell God provides peace and prosperity. Because well I am no longer in that dark cloud of my life no longer.

I AM GONNA LIVE MY LIFE ACCORDING TO GOD THROUGH HIS CONVICTIONS PLACED IN MY HEART AND LET NO ONE OR NOTHING IN THIS WORLD BRING THEM DOWN

stick to being relientless through love and compassion and you'll be ok

"A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need....Its poor judgment to gurantee another person's debt or put up security for a friend....Anyone who loves to quarrel loves sin....everyone who trusts in high wall invites diaster....The crooked heart will not propser; the lying tongue tumbles into trouble. -Proverbs 17: 17-20

Simplicity

After a week back from Costa Rica my life well is business. Also I find it really cool that a couple of new people have come into my life since getting back. Brothers friends etc. But class is getting super busy and I have not even started my internship yet. If I did not have Christ there is no way that I could possibly be doing all of the things I am doing. There is still a part of me that wants to drop everything and just go back. Go back to where I can dedicate all of my life effort sweat and tears into those people in Alajuelita. But I need to graduate and my mission field right now is this campus.

I am trying to find ways to bring brothers friends and classmates closer to God. Mass email social networking and big events such are not the way to go. Those might be appealing but its all about diving deep. Talking with them one on one about stuff that matters. I think its such a probelm these days with IPhones facebook technology. We sometimes only get to know most people at the surface. Some of my brothers who I have known for years only know a mere image of me. While my Costa Rica team members know the inside and out about me because of spending 4 days away from all the crap. I mean its nice to listen to some Phil Wickham or Jimmy Buffett while studying for a test, but sometimes its just God to have time with God without any of that.

Convictions

So I have to admit today it was tough. All day stuff with the fraternity and then work was just one of those days. I have been up since 7am with no sleep because of just well thinking too much. Trying to solve everything and not let God do his thing. Anyways things smoothed out. But now tonight theres a shin dig. I could go and get hammered but I really honestly am too mature in my walk to do that. I"ll stop by for like an hour then leave. I have my convictions to stick to. God through our walk puts little things in our heart we must stay dear to. One of those inovles drinking. The only time I drink is when its really private. I do not want everyone and their mother seeing a man of god who is on fire looking like a fool. How can I lead someone to Jesus when I am always partying it up. Its not bad to go out here and there but just only like once a month not even that.

Stick to your guns and convictions and God will do even more great things for you.

COSTA RICA

There are so many experiences pictures people events that I could take from Costa Rica. Spiritually though I left about or three things there that were getting in my way of God. There is a part of my heart that is been left there. I will go back sometime again. I did some things that God called me to do that I could never think of myself doing. Sharing a testimony to youth of a different culture/ generation, praying over a guy who was straight off the streets, praying over a homeless man, walking into some of the worst neighborhoods I will lay my eyes on, it goes on. But the boldness and relentless compassion that Christ put in my heart is showing so much back here. I have never been a fan of popularity or whatever, but I am a fighter. I am a fighter for friends family and brothers because I hate to see them struggle. To be a fighter and help bring lost people to the amazing truth of God, you have to battle in the trenches. You have to sometimes put yourself in bad situations. For example going out of your comfort zone to tell a friend he is messing up. To go to a rehab or jail to a random person that Christ loves you. Honestly God has made me that bold.

My flesh "dies" daily. All that matters is that the cross I wear around my neck, I try to follow it with all my heart. What I want to do on an ungiven day no longer exists. What God wants me to do see and serve matters. I can always remember reading Jeremiah 33:3 pretty much if I gave God a little chance he would do amazing things and turn my life around. I gave him one chance and he has done so much to last me a lifetime. Even though there are still parts of me that God is still working on (outward image) he still can use us to do amazing things for his kingdom.

1 DAY AWAY

This time tommorow I will be on my way to Orlando to fly out to Costa Rica. In only a matter of months I have been transformed by unstoppable love unstoppable compassion and unstoppable genoursity. I sometimes during worship at SUB30 or church on Sundays cry in tears of joy. Because I am nothing without him. I am nothing without the holy spirit inside me. I am still a broken vessel. But thank you for a God who uses broken people to spread the love of the gospel.

Almost a year ago I sat in a jail cell thinking......what in the heck are you on this world for. I find it really awesome that on the one year later exactly I will be on the mission field. I do not know what to expect, but I have a feeling something is going to change. I do not know. I am going with an open mind and an open heart.